Thursday, February 25, 2010


Para lang may picture. Hahaha.
Me behind the mask behind the mask.
(Yes. Dalawang mask. Wag niyo na i-gets. Ang emo eh.)

Been wanting to write about so many stuff lately. Mostly about school. School being... Not bad. I've been going past my body's limits since the year started. NOT part of the plan. I sleep past midnight and wake up after 3 or 4 hours of sleep. I cram all my school work, and when I say all... I MEAN ALL OF THEM. I do them a day or a few hours before deadline. Lethargic, indifferent -- ME. I don't even know what keeps me from doing them at the right time. I can be diligent. I just know it. :>

That being said, I'm a friggin college scholar (for last semester). Wudupp~ And, no. No benefits or anything. Just the title. Ewan. I'm the kind of person who's not really good at anything. Or maybe I'm still looking for something to be good at. But right now, there's nothing. I'm not smart. I'm not talented. I'm not anything.(<- This is me being very confident about myself). Being college scholar doesn't really make me feel like anything or anybody. Chamba lang -- That's what I felt. My first semester subjects were actually kind of easy (not to be boastful or anything). Eh seriously, if you were me who took those subjects, you'd get university scholar. No questions asked. I mean, what is it with my brain that doesn't get the point? I try so hard to study for certain exams and get an "okay" grade while a classmate hardly reads anything for it and gets the top score. It's not fair. I wouldn't call myself dumb or stupid, but I won't call myself smart either. Or maybe I CAN call myself stupid... Or bobo. Hahahaha. WELL... Since I know deep inside me that this college scholar title would never again be entitled to me, maybe susulitin ko na lang. Once in a lifetime. Yup. ONCE.

Also, I find myself overreacting about very useless things and not caring about things I'm actually supposed to care about. Gets? No? Yes? Yeah. I'm not a "no" kind of person and I hate it when no means leaving a good friendship behind. Fck that. :(

Ate Angel told me this yesterday, "Alam mo Pau, ang sweet sweet mo talaga! Parang wala kang problema. Napaka-carefree mong klase ng tao. Nakakagaan ng loob." Even though I would say that the only thing she said right was that I was sweet, I'd still love it if people saw me this way. Seriously. Kahit magiging plastik ang dating ko, at least I know I make people feel light about life.

Aaaaaaaaaand looking at the brighter side of life, 2 weeks before the Paramore concert! \m/ And I might be watching Owl City too! Now that's what I call zeh good life! :D

Hindi talento ang pagiging maganda.


ʎonqʎʇıɔ said...

i like the picture. it's very jabbawockeez-ish. haha

Pau said...

That being said, ang AWESOME nila. Hahaha! :))